men vs. women

this year we've had a lot of conversations in my grad school program about gender.  do men and women lead differently?  negotiate differently?  respond to criticism differently?  do men have an easier job getting a leadership position in an independent school?

i listened to this freakonomics podcast separate from our classes, but it would be a really interesting addition to that conversation.  a lot of great stuff packed into the half hour podcast - i'd highly recommend listening to it!

a photo a day

24 days until graduation and Columbia is already setting up bleachers for the ceremony? Seriously?!

9/11 memorial

i finally made it down to the 9/11 memorial today, along with one million tourists.  seriously: this must be on everyone's list of things to do when they come to new york.  people everywhere!  i should have guessed.  it was a perfect spring day, too, so i imagine that upped the numbers.

i'd seen the world trade center site from airplanes, which is pretty breathtaking, but it was very cool to be on the ground and look down into the memorial pools and up at the new buildings.

one world trade center, the new building that will be 1,776 feet tall:

the south memorial pool:

the sound of falling water is very peaceful, and it drowns out the street noise around you.  i'm sure this was on purpose, and it's a great effect.

the edge of the north pool:

as many people as there were, the site is huge and it didn't feel crowded.  the museum hasn't opened yet, so it doesn't take much time to walk through the whole site.  definitely glad that i made the trek downtown (it took an hour by subway to get there - makes you realize how big manhattan is!).

a photo a day

the floor plan for my houston apartment!  it has a loft for friends to stay in when they come visit - hooray!

a photo a day

Picnic lunch on a hillside in Central Park, overlooking an adult softball game. Current score: 1-0, red team. Bad pitching, pretty good hitting. Burning question: did these guys get off work for a 1pm game on a week day?! They appear to be in their 40s, so they aren't retired...it is very confusing to me...

i move away from new york in exactly one month.  where did this year go?!  time to make a conscious effort to appreciate every last day in new york city...

one of the best parts of grad school is being around other smart people and learning things from them.  this essay was recommended by a classmate of mine, and i find it incredibly interesting.  it's a bit of a long read, but worth it: the disadvantages of an elite education.

the parts i found most spot-on:

I learned to give that little nod of understanding, that slightly sympathetic “Oh,” when people told me they went to a less prestigious college. (If I’d gone to Harvard, I would have learned to say “in Boston” when I was asked where I went to school—the Cambridge version of noblesse oblige.)

um, i do this.  ugh.  "i went to school in north carolina."  only if pressed do i say i went to duke.  i am incredibly proud of my duke education, but you get a lot of reactions.  it stalls a lot of conversations.  i am fearful of sounding like i'm bragging.

...students from elite schools expect success, and expect it now. They have, by definition, never experienced anything else, and their sense of self has been built around their ability to succeed. The idea of not being successful terrifies them, disorients them, defeats them. They’ve been driven their whole lives by a fear of failure—often, in the first instance, by their parents’ fear of failure. The first time I blew a test, I walked out of the room feeling like I no longer knew who I was. The second time, it was easier; I had started to learn that failure isn’t the end of the world.

so accurate, both about the experiences of my very bright students, but also about my experience: this year i was a finalist for two jobs that i did not get.  the first rejection was like getting punched in the face.  then i ate a lot of bad food and laid in bed for many hours feeling sorry for myself and then i was okay.  the second rejection was so much easier.  learning to deal with academic or job-related failure is something that bright kids don't often have to learn how to do - something that i didn't have to learn how to do until i was 30.


We live in a society that is itself so wealthy that it can afford to provide a decent living to whole classes of people who in other countries exist (or in earlier times existed) on the brink of poverty or, at least, of indignity. You can live comfortably in the United States as a schoolteacher, or a community organizer, or a civil rights lawyer, or an artist—that is, by any reasonable definition of comfort. You have to live in an ordinary house instead of an apartment in Manhattan or a mansion in L.A.; you have to drive a Honda instead of a BMW or a Hummer; you have to vacation in Florida instead of Barbados or Paris, but what are such losses when set against the opportunity to do work you believe in, work you’re suited for, work you love, every day of your life? 

preach it.


there are many more fantastic passages in the full essay - i'd highly recommend it, especially to those interested in education!

a photo a day

Can you tell that I'm obsessed with flowering trees? I'm loving Spring! This one I passed in Riverside Park on a walk this afternoon.

i am entertained: 13 ways to spend your tax refund

a photo a day

A walk through Central Park on a chilly (50 degrees) but sunny afternoon!

what i'm listening to right now

"racing and chasing the sun," by joel rafael:


i just love this guy's voice: it totally captivates me.

additionally, i would LOVE to go to the newport folk festival someday...

observations about houston

i offer these observations on houston, based on the 48 hours i spent there this week:

1. at least 1/3 of the radio stations are in spanish.

2. humidity = high...i'm back in the south!  the swimming-through-the-air feeling is one i'm familiar with from my time in north carolina and atlanta.

3. i got a hug at the meet-and-great with the new families i'm going to be working with.  it's a mom who was one of three parents who interviewed me when i was out there in march, and she came to the meet-and-greet to tell me how excited she was that i'm coming to the school.  so sweet of her!  possible gross exaggeration: this would never happen in new york.

4. i ate mexican food for two of my four meals in the city.  this might be near the top of my list of reasons to move to texas.  my sister's favorite texas taco joint (which she took me to when i visited dallas in january) has a location in houston WITHIN WALKING DISTANCE OF MY NEW APARTMENT.  a-maz-ing.  my love of tacos is well known, and new york city does NOT have good mexican food options.

5. i think i'm going to like living in the central time zone.  tv shows are on an hour earlier, thus facilitating going to bed earlier!  yessss.  (old lady alert.)

this singing of the national anthem in boston gave me chills.  my favorite part is that the man singing realizes very quickly it's not about him, and he puts his microphone down.

i LOVE the singing of patriotic songs.  (though i don't think anyone ever told me i had to be patriotic, the actions and words of my parents and grandparents have always made me very proud to be an american.)  i would LOVE for this to happen at every sporting event, from now until forever.  i would sing along happily, getting chills every time.

my wednesday night yoga teacher often gives us a theme at the beginning of class - something to think about as we sweat through the poses.  i really like this - a 90 minute meditation on a topic.

tonight she started class by talking about the bombings in boston and saying: "let us be thankful for our sound minds and strong bodies."

yoga is hard, but as i practiced tonight i was reminded that i am lucky to be able to work that hard with these strong limbs and this sound mind.

a photo a day

A spring evening on the Columbia campus! Flowering trees, old buildings, and the moon up above.

file this under "things that would never happen in the united states"

new zealand lawmakers burst into song as they legalize gay marriage

(additionally, i don't understand a word of this song, but it's gorgeous.)

a photo a day

I found an apartment! And then I celebrated by eating lunch at a great casual Indian restaurant that a classmate (who is from Houston) recommended. It's only a couple blocks from where I'll be living (bonus). On Mondays their entire menu is vegetarian (double bonus)! This will DEFINITELY not be the last time I eat here.

jurassic park in 3D imax

i saw jurassic park in a theater in durham during the summer of 1993.  i was 10.  i had just finished 5th grade, and i was at the bad-ass summer camp run by the math teacher at my school, where we learned card games, watched and analyzed tv commercials, and probably did other things that i can't remember.  it was awesome.

one day of camp we went to the movies in the afternoon, and the younger kids (me) were supposed to see some movie that was rated PG, and the older kids went to see jurassic park (PG-13).  my friend molly's older sister was an older kid, and she and her friends went to see jurassic park.  molly and i bought tickets to the lame kids movie and then went to jurassic park, too.  rebellion!!  it was so freaking scary (during the kitchen scene, i remember thinking "this PG-13 rating is legit and i am too young to see this"), and also it ran longer than the weenie movie, so when we emerged into the parking lot the kids our age had already gotten on the bus to go back to school.  we had been caught sneaking into the other movie!!!  but no one yelled at us.  that was awesome.

fast forward TWENTY YEARS.  jurassic park just got re-released in 3D imax and i went to see it this weekend with my friend talia.  (we saw a preview for it a couple months ago and were like "we must see this!")  3D glasses have gotten cooler/less cool (you choose) since i last wore 3D glasses.  this is me being scared of the movie to come.

we are getting our scared faces ready.

3D imax movie tickets are $21.  TWENTY-ONE DOLLARS.  i had a discount ticket thing, so i only paid $15.  it felt like the bargain of the century.

not pictured: the wine and chipotle burritos we snuck in.  i'm still a rebel.

um, this movie STANDS THE TEST OF TIME.  for a while we just laughed at the 90s hair and clothing and technology.  then there were scary parts, but i remembered that they were coming.  then there were scary parts that i did NOT remember and they were so scary!!  velociraptors in the room with the circuit breakers!!  but for a PG-13 movie it's pretty tame...not much blood at all, no sex, you don't see anyone die.  times have changed.  PG-13 movies now-a-days often have lots of those things.

also, the music was as awesome as i remembered.  also #2, samuel l. jackson is in this movie.  how did i forget that?!

also #3, about 95% of people in that theater were 27-33 years old like us, aka reliving their childhoods.

totally worth $15.

a photo a day

I'm off to Houston for 2 days to meet the kids and families I'll be working with next year...and to find an apartment!

a photo from yesterday

yes, i did pickle happy hour with friends from my program.  it was rainy and i freaked out that no one would come (i'd organized the outing), but 10 people came (yay!) and we drank beer, ate fried foods, laughed a lot, and tried all these kinds of pickles!  from the back: pickled carrots, jalapeños, green beans, beets, tomatoes, and three kinds of traditional pickles.  amazing!  and i think we exceeded our recommended salt intake for the day.

pizza!

this week i went to my second cooking class, courtesy of my christmas present from dad!  the theme this time: making homemade pizzas.  YUM.  i experimented, pretty successfully, with homemade pizza dough in august when i was at home with my parents, but i learned a lot from this class.  for example: to make your oven EVEN hotter (the hotter the oven, the better the pizza), turn it on to 500 degrees (or as hot as it goes).  let it preheat.  then turn it to broil for 10 minutes.  then turn it back to 500 degrees and put the pizza in.  the broiler will heat it the oven up to 600 degrees (according to my teacher).  i also got some great tips on how to make super amazing dough (looooong rise/proofing time).  i can't wait to try them out when i'm in a real apartment!

we made dough first, and got to put it in a baggie and take it home with us.  mine is in my fridge now, waiting for pizza-making to happen (probably tomorrow).

then, with dough the instructor started yesterday, we made pizzas!  everyone made two, and we tasted each others' creations.  he had lots of suggestions of topping combinations (we got recipes to take home).  i made:

1. broccoli rabe, garlic oil, red pepper flakes, ricotta, and lemon (DELISH).

and 2. freshly-made red sauce, mozzarella, roasted mushrooms, and caramelized onions.  incredible.  i got big compliments on this one when i shared it around.  why am i not caramelizing onions more often?!

we also made two big salads to share - the fennel one on the right was the best.  i've never bought fennel before, but i will DEFINITELY be making this salad in the future.

another success!  i can't wait to move into an apartment in june and cook much more frequently.  [right now "cooking" is usually (a) stir frying, (b) making burritos, (c) cooking pasta, or (d) heating up frozen food.  all of this is fine in moderation...but we've moved past moderation at this point.]

a photo a day

Found on my door shortly after I announced on Facebook that I'd gotten a job. My suitemates are adorable.

The note is obviously still up...so I can feel good about myself every time I see it!

“Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.”
--Margaret Thatcher

a photo a day

Impromptu snacknic (snack picnic) in the park this afternoon with friends from my cohort! Gorgeous day! Hooray for spring!

i'm going out to houston for two days next week to do a couple things at my new school, but i'll also apartment hunt while i'm there.  i called a couple apartment complexes to make sure they had availability for the kind of apartment i want, and to set up a time for me to take a tour and see different apartments.  two places told me the weather (83 degrees), but one of those places APOLOGIZED because it's supposed to be cloudy.  um, it will be 83 degrees.  put your apology away.

i leave new york in 7 weeks. here's what i want to do before i leave:

walk across the brooklyn bridge at sunset and then eat pizza at grimaldi's

go to the world trade center memorial.  (stop putting it off because you know it will be sad.)

see book of mormon

see matilda

walk the high line when it's warm and sunny outside

go to coney island

go to the natural history museum

go to the rooftop garden at the met

have another picnic in central park

[new yorkers: what else should be on my list?!]

tofu!

for christmas, my dad got me a gift certificate for two cooking classes at a place in new york that runs lots of vegetarian classes.  the only other cooking class i've taken was a baking class in atlanta that was awesome (another gift - from my duke friends), but most cooking classes are meat-centered, and we know that isn't my thing.  so good work to dad for finding a vegetarian-friendly place!

this week i took my first class: making and cooking with tofu!  if you are not a vegetarian, you probably have no reason to eat tofu, but let me tell you that i think tofu is delicious and will order it whenever i see it on the menu (mostly at thai or chinese restaurants).  uncooked tofu tastes like nothing, but when you cook it well it is amazing.

let me first say that we were partnered up in this class to make tofu and then to make recipes, and my partner was a librarian and i am a teacher and we immediately realized our joint desire to make the BEST DAMN TOFU IN THE CLASS.  teachers and librarians are rule-followers and pleasers.  our tofu turned out the best and we were VERY proud of ourselves.

making tofu is like making cheese: pureed soybeans are mixed with water, boiled, and then an acid is added to them and it splits into what is basically curds and whey!

separating into curds and whey:

packing our curds (tofu!) into a tofu press:

weighing it down to press out the water and push the tofu into a firm block:

my half of our block of tofu!  it looks JUST like store-bought tofu, and tastes just as good, if not better.

i was probably the only person getting onto the subway with a block of tofu in a bag, but whatever.

then we cooked with tofu!  we used store-bought tofu to cook with so we could take our precious homemade stuff home.

pouring wine to have with our feast:

appetizer: tofu in dashi (that's the broth) with tempura vegetables:

meal! from top left: pressed tofu with garlic and mint and quinoa, spinach mushroom quiche (with tofu instead of eggs - i made this one - SO GOOD), mango salsa, baked tofu with lemon and butter sauce, and spicy hashed bean curd with pepitas (pumpkin seeds).

it was a feast!

the quiche i made isn't going to fool anyone into thinking it's the "real" thing, but it was delicious.  that's the thing about vegetarian cooking: if you want tofu to taste like meat (or eggs, if you're using tofu instead of eggs), you will fail.  you have to think about your meal differently and then you will be happy.

hooray for a fun cooking class!  thanks, dad-o!  next week: the second class i signed up for is learning how to make homemade pizzas.  perhaps a little more exciting to the audience of this blog!

for those of you who don't listen to this american life, their episode last week about the rise in the number of people who receive federal disability payments is SO interesting and explains how the situation is very complicated.  i learned a lot, but don't really know what should be done.  it's worth listening to if you've got an hour-long car/plane/train/bus ride in your future and need something to entertain you!

“Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”
--Elizabeth Gilbert

a photo a day

Mets game this afternoon with friends from my grad school cohort! It may only be 45 degrees, but the sun is out and we're in heaven! Hooray for spring!

a post where i will bury the lede

folks, i have a job.

exclamation points everywhere!!

it was an emotional road - great interviews where schools seemed to love me, punctuated by long stretches where i felt invisible.  over the past 5 months i applied to about 40 jobs, had about 20 phone interviews, got invited to final round interviews on campus at 2 schools (in houston and seattle)...and got neither of those jobs.

womp womp.

then i spent 36 hours lying in my bed and feeling bad about myself and my life (punctuated by going to class and eating and being a wimp on the phone to my sister).  both of the positions i didn't get went to internal candidates.  internal candidates are the bane of my existence.

i imagined my life if i didn't get a job.  there were a couple alternatives.

option 1: live in my parents' house and work at the dairy queen.  except there is no dairy queen in town and the little dipper (our version of dairy queen) closed this year.  see, i don't even have a place to work.  woe is me!

option 2: live in my sister's guest room and pay rent by cleaning the apartment and preparing cocktails for my sister and her boyfriend when they return home from work every day.  watch lots of tv.

option 3: move to hawaii and sleep in a hammock on the beach and practice yoga every day until my savings runs out.

i miiiiiight have been a little dramatic about this whole "can't find a job" thing.  people tried to remind me that it was only march, but i was in a funk and just wanted to mope for a while

then i emerged from the funk and was a normal person again.  i applied for more jobs and sent follow up emails to some schools i'd applied to but hadn't heard back from.

then the houston school called me again.  turns out when they said "everyone really liked you, BUT..." they meant it!  everyone really did like me, and when a different position became available at the school they didn't want to interview for it.  they just wanted to hire me.  and in truth, the position is a great one and after working out the details i have accepted it - i'm moving to houston!  i will be one of six deans (my job will be very similar to my last job: i'll do academic advising, discipline, communication with parents, and look out for the general welfare of kids), and the deans at this school are also the college counselors (i have no experience in this, so major professional development will be coming for me in this area!).  i really like the other deans that i'll be working with and i loved the school when i visited.  the job is a new challenge, and moving to houston will be a new adventure.  i'm so excited!

yesterday i had a VERY boring class and used the internet to distract me (shh, don't tell), so i have some entertaining links for you!  you're welcome.

1. the world as 100 people

2. the changing of the seasons from space

3. jimmy and the chickeneers

4. "what 2000 calories looks like":



(note: i am not so bold/rude as to watch videos in class...i found and saved them until later.  professional procrastinator move.)

march: 6, 7, 8, & 9

my reading load for school this semester is lighter than it was in the fall (or i've hit my stride or something), and i was able to more reading this month than i've done in a while - hooray!

the light between oceans, by m.l. stedman (i am a casual member of goodreads, and this was a book they recommended.  a couple who can't have children find a baby in a lifeboat on the beach.  do they keep the baby, and if so: will anyone discover that the baby isn't their own?  a quick read and pretty entertaining!)

mr. penumbra's 24-hour bookstore, by robin sloan (i read this for the awesome book club that i'm in with some atlanta friends.  it's kind of a mystery that bridges the old world (books) and the new world (google) - an interesting premise and another quick and fun read.  i'm finding that's what i crave these days: fiction that is somewhat effortless and page-turning, but is well-written and has a solid plot.  i'd recommend this one, too!)

kindle singles: broken voices, nate in venice, and lincoln's little girl (you know of my love of kindle singles, short stories that you can buy for $0.99-$2.99 from amazon.com.  i am also a member of amazon prime, which gives you free 2 day shipping on almost everything on the site and the ability to "loan" some books for free.  so!  if you're interested in any of these short stories (click links to read about them), i can loan them to you for 2 weeks; recently i bought 7 or 8 of them and these are my 3 favorites.  you don't need a kindle - you can read on your phone or computer.)

maphead, by ken jennings (my favorite jeopardy champion's book about maps - i bought it for dad for christmas last year and had been meaning to read it once he finished it.  it's readable and very interesting - my favorite fact: we "orient" a map by turning it to match the direction we're traveling, but why is it called "orienting"?  apparently in medieval europe maps were printed with east at the top (not north, as they typically are now), and the east = the orient, hence "to orient."  i love fun facts like this!  i'd recommend this book; the chapters stand alone pretty well, so you can pick it up every now and then without having to remember what happened in previous chapters.)