parking lot conversation

the scene: i have just gotten out of my car at home.  my roommate is leaving the apartment to go trick or treating with some friends who have kids.

me: um, can you believe those new speed bumps?!
roomie: no! they are going to screw up the suspension in our cars, in addition to being annoying.
me: really?  or are we exaggerating.
roomie: yes!  they are the bumpity bumpity kind!
me: true.  ugh!
roomie: the condo association needs to focus on fixing the gate instead of adding new speed bumps that aren't even necessary.
me: they are old and having nothing better to do!
roomie: no!  they have nothing better to do than meddle!
me: how far do you think it is from the gate to our apartment?  1/4 mile?  one trip around the track?  and now there are two speed bumps between here and there.
roomie: three!  three!  there's that one as you go through the gate!  and no.  it's 1/8 of a mile.
me: i'm going to say 1/6 of a mile just to not be accused of exaggerating.
roomie: fine.
me: and let's be honest, why do we need these speed bumps?  have you ever seen anyone drive too fast up that hill?
roomie: yes!  me!  i've got places to go!
me: i knew you would be indignant about this with me.