another reason you wish you worked at my school

An email conversation between me and one of my coworkers -  the man I would marry if I were 70 (like him) or he were 27 (like me).  I adore him.

Email from me to all teachers of 11th graders:
Hi all -
We haven’t met in a while, but this Thursday our first 11th grade team meeting of the semester is scheduled – 7:45am in room 105. I’ll bring some breakfast. Please be thinking about student concerns that you’d like to bring up. [Principal] would also like your feedback on whether we should hold any students’ contracts because of behavioral or academic concerns. These would need to be pretty serious concerns...but be thinking, and let us know.

Thanks -
Claire and [my co-Dean]


Reply from my BFF:
Will be there. Only contract I know about is Willis's. He hates me.

Sent from my iPhone

[Let's just take a moment for the fact that he is 70 (literally) and has - and uses effectively - an iPhone.]


So I replied:
Rumor has it that Willis wants YOUR contract held. Ooooooooh! Fight, fight, fight!


My BFF:
A food fight it will be. Game on ! Will you be my second in case I should fall ?

Sent from my iPhone


Me:
Um, of course! And in the meantime, I will pour water into your mouth and wipe your brow during the fight – you obviously won’t be able to, as you’ll be wearing boxing gloves.


My BFF:
OMG. Don't tell Willis.

Sent from my iPhone


I then forwarded my BFF's email to Willis, who replied:

I will win. Because he’s the 1 person on faculty I walk faster than. Though I really should be ashamed because he’s more than twice my age.


[Note to readers who aren't under the age of 30: BFF=best friend forever, and it is what middle school girls call each other.  I like to appropriate those kinds of phrases and use them as my own.]